Saturday January 13th, Track to the Future – Home Teams Semifinals, @Roy Wilkins Auditorium

Saturday January 13th, 2024

Bout 1: Maul Rats vs. Roller Vortex

The first semifinal bout featured the top-seeded Roller Vortex taking on the winless Maul Rats. These teams met previously in October, where the Vortex won 170-157. The Maul Rats looked to avenge that defeat, and began this bout with a 3-0 jam from Triple Shock Latte. However, Battlerina answered back with a 4-0 jam to take the lead for the Vortex. They extended the lead in the following jam, as R.I.P.unzel took advantage of a Little Rascal penalty to score 8 points, though Little Rascal did have 5 in the jam. The next jam went the full two minutes, as Wheelie Nelson got lead for the Vortex before being sent to the box and losing lead privileges. The jam was close, with Killer Bea taking a star pass and outscoring Wheelie Nelson 11-10, cutting the Vortex lead to 22-19. Wheelie Nelson picked up a second penalty near the end of the jam, so she began the next one in the box. That allowed Triple Shock Latte to race through the pack and quickly take lead jammer, but solid blocking by the Vortex allowed Wheelie Nelson to outscore Triple Shock Latte 12-11. 

In the following jam, BooBoo got lead for the Rats, but was passed by Lexi Cuter before entering the pack and had to settle for a 4-4 jam. The next jam would prove to be one of the most pivotal of the night, as a mass exodus of Roller Vortex skaters to the box – for a few seconds, blocker Mace Ventura was their only skater on the track – allowed Little Rascal to put up 12 points and regain the lead for the Maul Rats, 46-38. The Rats went on to extend the lead, as an early power jam opportunity for Velvet Wench resulted in her taking a 6-0 jam. The streak of lead jams for the Rats continued, as Triple Shock Latte put up an 8-2 jam to extend their lead to 60-40. BooBoo built on that with a quick 4-0 jam before Battlerina finally stopped the 6-jam run, scoring 4 of her own to cancel out the previous jam. R.I.P.unzel took advantage of a quick lead for the Vortex in the next jam to score 15 points, though Killer Bea – receiving another star pass, something done by the Maul Rats in nearly every jam they didn’t lead – scored 8 to prevent a massive momentum swing. 

At this point, the score stood at 72-59, but the Maul Rats began to build up their lead yet again. It started with Triple Shock Latte scoring 4 points before noticing Wheelie Nelson in the box, calling it off to allow BooBoo to start the next jam as the only jammer on the track. BooBoo failed to take advantage, as 4 points by her were canceled out with an apex jump by Wheelie Nelson just as the jam was being called off. (The officials did discuss whether or not Wheelie Nelson’s 4 points came in time, but they deemed that the points stood.) The next jam, though, was a big one for the Maul Rats: Switch Please pushed through the Vortex tripod to allow Little Rascal through easily, and she put up 20 to Shadoux’s 8 to extend the lead to 100-71, becoming the first team to hit the century mark in the first half all season. The next jam was scoreless, while the Vortex actually won the final jam of the half 8-4, making the halftime score 104-79 in favor of the Maul Rats. It was their first halftime lead of the season.

R.I.P.unzel began the second half as the only jammer on the track, performing an apex jump to secure lead before getting caught up to by Kid Vicious and settling for a 3-3 jam. In the next jam, Triple Shock Latte scored 4 points before calling it off while on the power jam, setting up BooBoo just as she had done late in the first half. This time, BooBoo’s 4 points came without reply, extending the lead to 115-82. The following jam was scoreless, as Lexi Cuter secured lead for the Vortex before wiping out on an attempted apex jump, forcing her to call off the jam and avoid being outscored. The next jam was tightly contested, with Wheelie Nelson sent to the box early on, but when she left the box, neither she nor Velvet Wench had yet to complete their initial pass. Wheelie Nelson did ultimately score 4 points before being sent to the box again, but still took the jam as Velvet Wench was held scoreless for the entire 2 minutes by a sturdy Roller Vortex wall. 

Her last penalty came late enough for Triple Shock Latte to begin the following jam on the power jam, where Triple Shock Latte failed to capitalize and was outscored 12-6. R.I.P.unzel further shaved the lead with a 3-0 jam, cutting it to 121-103. However, the Vortex were unable to continue the hot streak, as a Battlerina penalty allowed Little Rascal to score 6 points and establish a little more breathing room. Lexi Cuter broke through the pack first in the next jam, but she would pick up a penalty, allowing Killer Bea to take the 2-minute jam 12-4. Triple Shock Latte followed that with a 5-0 jam, further extending the Maul Rats’ lead to 144-107. The next jam was the reverse of the one two jams prior, as BooBoo took lead jammer – forcing the Vortex to pass the star to Annaconda – before being penalized, allowing Annaconda to score her only 10 points of the night. However, 8 points from BooBoo prevented a complete disaster for the Maul Rats. Lexi Cuter followed with a 4-0 jam, then a single point by Wheelie Nelson cut the deficit to exactly 30 points, 152-122. 

The next jam, though, just about iced it. Triple Shock Latte raced to the lead for the Rats, while Vortex jammer Battlerina struggled to get out of the pack. She attempted to pass the star to Mace Ventura, but it was called back, most likely due to an illegal pass. With that, she continued to struggle as Triple Shock Latte kept scoring points. When all was said and done (and Mace Ventura had eventually received the star), Triple Shock Latte had posted a 16-0 jam to effectively put the game out of reach. Lexi Cuter responded with 2 points in the next jam, but the Vortex would ultimately run out of time. In her second jam in a row, the last jam of the bout, Lexi Cuter put up 19 points, but it wasn’t nearly enough as Little Rascal had 8 of her own. As the clock ticked down to 0, a single orange confetto (the plural is “confetti”) fell to the track, putting the final stamp on a 176-143 win for the Maul Rats. It was their first win of the season, yet put them in the championship bout, while the Roller Vortex will have to fight for third.

Bout 2: Bodies of Water vs. Wednesday Warnings

The second semifinal pitted the Bodies of Water against the Wednesday Warnings. Though both teams had identical 2-1 records, the Bodies held the second seed while the Warnings were seeded third. When the teams met in October, the Bodies came away with a 144-112 win. In the opening jam, Chippa Tooth secured lead for the Bodies but was passed by Sintripetal Force before reaching the pack, forcing her to call off the jam before any points were scored. In the next jam, Bri Zuss took lead jammer for the Warnings, a privilege that was stripped when she was sent to the box. This allowed Fanny Smack to score 8 points, and 5 from Bri Zuss were not enough to prevent the Bodies from taking the bout’s first lead. The next jam was a fairly straightforward 4-0 in favor of the Bodies, but the next jam was anything but. Lil’ Rapscallion secured lead jammer as her counterpart, Major Threat, was sent to the box, allowing a massive 12-0 jam to extend the lead to 24-5. That lead was further extended in the next jam, where Chippa Tooth scored 4 points to T-Wrecks’s 0. 

Needing to stop the run, Sintripetal Force did just that with a 12-0 jam for the Wednesday Warnings. Bri Zuss added 6 in the next jam before a 3-1 jam for Skatey Gaga cut the lead down to 3 points. Chippa Tooth then responded with a much-needed 8-0 jam to give the Bodies of Water more breathing room. T-Wrecks followed with a single Warnings point in the next jam to cut the scoreline to 37-27. After that, though, the Bodies settled into a groove. It began with a 2-0 jam for Polar Blair, which was followed by 1 point for Lil’ Rapscallion. The next jam appeared to end scoreless, but after a discussion by the officials, they awarded 3 points to Chippa Tooth to further solidify the lead. Looking for a bigger jam to capitalize on the run of lead jams, it appeared that Fanny Smack might have been on her way to doing just that in the next jam. However, the jam was stopped after only 4 points from her because of an injury to Major Threat, who was jamming for the Warnings. Major Threat did not return to the bout. 

The next jam was another 4-0 jam for the Bodies, this time carried out by Polar Blair, slowly but surely building up a solid lead. Lil’ Rapscallion followed with yet another 4-0 jam to take the score to 55-27. The next jam was the longest one in a while, with Chippa Tooth scoring 8 points, the last 4 of which came on an apex jump to punctuate the Bodies’ run. In the following jam, the Warnings finally got back on the board, with Skatey Gaga scoring 5 points, the team’s first in 8 jams. Still, she was outscored by Fanny Smack, who scored 8. The next jam was the Warnings’ best jam of the half, as Sintripetal Force got the team’s first lead in 9 jams, scoring 16 points while Polar Blair was held up by the Warnings’ defense after her initial 4. This gave the Warnings some momentum going into halftime, though the Bodies still led 75-48 at the break.

Any momentum that the Warnings gained at the end of the first half evaporated at the start of the second, as Chippa Tooth opened with an 8-0 jam for the Bodies of Water. T-Wrecks answered back with 4 points in the next jam before calling it off while on the power jam. That allowed Sintripetal Force to begin the next jam as the only jammer on the track, but she was unable to capitalize. In fact, Fanny Smack came out of the box to take lead jammer and a 6-0 jam. The next two jams went better for the Warnings, as Bri Zuss outscored Lil’ Rapscallion 7-4 before T-Wrecks put up a 4-0 jam to cut the lead back to 30 points, 93-63. A quick 2-0 jam for Chippa Tooth stopped the short period of Warning dominance but Bri Zuss answered with 7 points to Fanny Smack’s 3 to cut the deficit to 28 points. That was the closest the bout had been since halftime. Lil’ Rapscallion answered with a short 4-0 jam, something the Bodies excelled at over the course of the night. 

In the next jam, Sintripetal Force scored 11 points before being penalized late, though Polar Blair scored 7 to prevent more of a comeback. Thanks to Sintripetal Force’s penalty, Chippa Tooth started with a power jam, where she breezed through the pack to take lead jammer before scoring 4 points and calling it off. In the following jam, Bri Zuss began with a lead that was later lost due to a penalty, putting Whoopsie Daisy on the power jam. Whoopsie Daisy scored her only 14 points of the night, and while Bri Zuss did score 10, she was sent to the box a second time near the end of the jam. That gave Lil’ Rapscallion a power start, but she was held up by the Warnings’ blockers, who allowed Bri Zuss to race straight out of the box and take lead jammer, scoring 4 points to bring the score to 127-95. 

The next jam was another power jam for the Bodies, but Polar Blair was only able to extend the lead by a single point. However, Chippa Tooth did better with the 4-0 jam that followed. In the next one, Fanny Smack had a power jam but was unable to score more than 4 points in a tightly-fought jam. Still, this brought the lead to 136-95 in favor of the Bodies. A third straight 4-0 Bodies of Water jam, this time courtesy of Lil’ Rapscallion, took the score to 140-95 with the clock ticking down. The Warnings needed a miracle, something they did not get despite 20 points from Sintripetal Force in the final jam. Despite being sent to the box, Polar Blair picked up 7 in that same jam, bringing the final score to 147-115 in favor of the Bodies. They advance to their second straight championship game and will face the Maul Rats, whereas the Wednesday Warnings will not defend their title and have to take on the Roller Vortex for third place.

Written by: Aidan Hofstedt